COOL!!! .:Apr 07 09:.
What people don't understand is that writers LOVE trains... PURE HATE though??? Ehhhhh... these cats are on some other ish... I LOVE this video!!! At 4:39 they actually get scoped. BEASTIN on the steel!!!
An old piece but one I still get a kick out of... peep... .:Mar 31 09:.
HOW TO BE A POET
BY MIKE BELIEVE
BEFORE YOU START:
1. Change your name
Sorry to tell you this, but the name ya mama gave you ain't gonna cut it. The names of gods of lesser known religions always work. Prefixes like king, queen, sista or mother will do.
Here are some ideas to get you started: Chewbakah, Allah-zilla, tofu-pork, olos nah, albino jones, kizer SEW SAY, bob Marley jr jr, omega supreme, optimus prime, black Africa, Unspoken word, the brown hornet, SO SO BLACK, NICK SAINT, almighty dreadlock head wrap king Solomon, Jesus Jackson.
2. Look the part
It's not what you say, but how you look when you say it. Here are some fashion tips for the aspiring slam star:
- DO NOT comb your hair. EVER. Grow locks if you can - might be a good prop later on. Also, facial hair works for both male and females.
- Head wraps & wool hats are appropriate in any season. Looking hot and uncomfortable will subconsciously bend the audience in your favor.
- Wear red black and green wrist-bands. If you're not black, red gold and green works just as well.
- Approach the mic with a well-chewed chew-stick in your mouth.
- Rock t- shirts of slain political leaders. When Che or Malcolm X are not available, Bob Marley makes a good stand in.
3. Never have paper
Reading from paper on stage makes you appear amateurish and unsure about your feelings. Thought this was a forum about sharing your true feelings with a group of caring, listening people? NOPE! sorry!!! It's about performance, first and foremost. Your poem may be heartfelt and well-crafted, and about your dear departed mother, but if you're shuffling through papers the implication is that she wasn't good enough to memorize the piece for.
4. From foreign lands
Whenever possible, be a person of color, preferably from a place with an accent. It makes you seem exotic and people are less likely to question you, as Americans don't get out much. If unsure what ethnicity to claim, just say that you are half or three quarters of something.
CONTENT
1. Explore the canon with this list of mandatory subject matter:
- I don't fit your stereotype poems
- I hate (insert name of political leader everyone hates here) poems. No research necessary for this one. Remember this: no one checks facts that are stated loudly.
- The revolution will not be: (something that rhymes with televised) poems
- I really love hip-hop poems, preferably referencing old school.
- Sex poems. In graphic detail, preferably featuring extended metaphors about food, sports, or architecture.
- Poems about poetry
- Being a woman/all things womb related
- Answer poems. These are a great way to ride the steam of last weeks most popular piece.
- Cultural food poems
- Weed poems.
- I love your genitalia poems. This archetype is also commonly known as the **** poem. It's the theatrical equivalent of a personal ad. Context and innuendo is everything here. As an exercise, read the directions to BEN GAY aloud, really slowly and with many breathy pauses.
2. Never be happy
Misery loves company that's why poetry readings are packed. On the off-chance that the audience is actually listening, you should never have anything celebratory or particularly happy to say. I did a poem one time about how happy I was and was nearly beaten to death by the angry mob wielding still-hot tea bags and sharpened chew sticks. Keep your tone somber, accusatory, strident, and/or mournful.
3. Having a chorus or hook
If you don't think your thought will pan out for your full 5 minutes of microphone time, a chorus or hook can be your best friend. Repeat a catchy line, or even just the title of the poem after approximately 3 lines of literature. If the audience looks like they are not buying it, have them say it with you.
4. Buzz words you can never go wrong with:
- 3 rd eye
- Cipher
- 360%
- Higher level
- Sista/brotha/queen/king
- Mental
- Womb and/or tomb (together are a lethal combination)
- Lick
- Amerikkka
- Made-up words that sound like they might be real. Trust, no one will remember them long enough to check when they get home. Try these out: Divionism, angeration, fuckery, de-mock rah see
5. Other artists' names to evoke or quote:
Bob Marley, Che, Malcolm X, Gil Scott-Heron, Nikki Giovanni, Saul Williams, Maya Angelou, Chuck D, KRS 1, Taye Diggs... Try to evoke names of people you are sure not to meet any time soon. Dead people don't get out much so using their names is virtually risk-free.
PERFORMANCE TIPS
1. Voice Control
Two strategies here, and both are good for emphasizing key points. The first is to learn to yell really, really loudly. Things spoken loudly must be the truth, or at least seem intense enough to pass as such. The second is to hold the last note of every fifth word or so. Yes it's cliche' but cliche's are cliche's cause they work.
2. The art of the intro
This is the only time people are guaranteed to actually listen to what you have to say, so drag out your intro for as long as possible. Think of it as getting 2 poems out for the price of one. Here are some classic ice-breakers:
- I just wrote this
- Where's Brooklyn at? (guaranteed to work anywhere in the world)
- I just moved here last week
- I had a hard day today, y'all. . .
- Peace and blessings
- You'll have to excuse me if I can't get through this with out crying its about my ________
- This was really hard for me to write
- Have you ever been _________ and _______ happens well that happened to me and I wrote this
- This one's for the ladies
- This is my first time up here
- Can u hear me in the back?
3. Closing your eyes and flailing your arms
Arm-flailing is absolutely necessary. (In fact, having hands free to flail is an extra advantage of not using paper.) The effect on the audience member is that you are possessed. Even more effective when combined with closed eyes.
4. Mastering the silent thank you
When the clapping starts at the end of your piece, first bite your bottom lip, then silently mouth the word VELENCIO to yourself while nodding and walking off. It looks like you're saying something gracious and humble. Try it in a mirror to get the gestures right.
ADVANCED TECHNIQUES
Once you have mastered the basic poetry skills, it's time to introduce the advanced techniques. The following are major theatrics and are best left for the pros:
Tears...
If you can cry on cue, use it at every possible opportunity. Even better if you are already crying when you come to the mic.
Partners/group work
If you are not into sharing the love please don't attempt.
Singing
Always great for emphasis(no actual singing skills required)
Abstract poems (advanced)
This my friend is my favorite of all. You can literally say anything. Its all in the delivery.
You should see a difference in your fan base within 2-3 weeks by following these simple steps. Results may vary
EXILE!!! .:Mar 09 09:.
This is probably old news to you but I can;t get enough of this vid. Big ups Felt One for puttin me on...
- JABAone
.:Dec 04 07:.
So last Friday on my way to spin at Red C, and was approached by a homeless man. He casually asked me for a dollar to help him out as he has been down on his luck. Thinking about everything that has been going on in my life, both good and bad, I kinda laughed and told him that I too was down on my luck and could use a dollar myself. He kinda stared at me for a bit.
He said, "Brotha I can see the sadness in your eyes. Here, you could use this." and pulled a crumpled dollar bill out of his pocket.
I was COMPLETELY blown away. I had never been SO humbled before. I told him that I couldn't accept his generosity but that I TRULY was grateful. Later that night I on my drive out of town I could not get that occurance out of my mind. I usually give a dollar or loose change to anyone who asks, but this time... it was ME who was being looked out for.
The following Sunday evening after our gig at Heat, I was standing outside the venue with Kid Riz and saying my goodbyes to the folks who came through. Who comes along? The brother from Friday night. Working his way from person to person asking for a dollar or ANY help they could give being turned down left and right.
"Here you go" I said reaching into my wallet and pulling out a couple of dollars. He just kinda bowed his head and said thank you. Then I stopped him.
"You don't know how much your generosity meant to me Friday night. I don't know if you remember but you tried putting a dollar in my pocket to help me out. Thank you bro!" I said
He said "You looked like you needed a little help yourself. You asked and I obliged."
You never know what you will encounter or who you will encounter along your journey through life. You never know what a person's situation may or may not be. But if you can be that beam of light or that helping hand to someone who TRULY needs it... you can rest assured that you have done your job. Next time someone asks for help and you are in a situation where you CAN... do your thing! It does make a difference.
Youtube .:Aug 21 07:.
So... I walk into work and run into my boy Mr Groove of Z90.3 and the Sharpshooterz Fam. He is SUPER hyped on this video he has watched on YouTube. Now for the most part... I don't ever get too excited about junk you find on Myspace, YouTube, blah blah blah. Yes it may be funny but when cats see it... it's already been seen. You know what I mean when you get that "Oh... yeah Iv'e seen this already" accompanied with an eye roll from your boy and them? Anyway... I'm just saying normally I'm not the one to tell people that they need to peep this or that video, however I will make an exception in this case. God bless Mr Groove and my Indian people. My old calculator ain't got no bow... and I MEAN that...
Everything I ever needed to know in life, I learned growing up in the hood. .:Jun 30 07:.
I absolutely LOVED growing up in National City. (a small city/varrio just 10 minutes north of the US/Mexico Border). I would not have become the person I am today, nor would I have come to see and experience life as I do now if I had lived anywhere else. What do I mean? Simply put, everything I learned about life I learned growing up in the hood.
1) Don't trust ANYONE- When I was 5 I was hanging out in the house, until I heard the chimes of our local ice cream man. I got some cash from my mom and ran out the door to buy a pack of rain-blo bubble gum and one of those mexican suckers that look like corn, but covered in pico? Anyway, moms gave me the smallest bill she had, which was a 10 dollar bill. I bolted out the door, around the corner. Rolled up, bought my goods, went home and sat on the living room floor enjoying my candy. Moms came at me with "where's my change?" My response? "What's change? The Ice cream man gave me my candy and left." Yup, I got GOT! Needless to say I never saw that ice cream man again.
2) Act up and you get smacked up- How does the quote go? "Wearing the wrong color outfit will get your mouth split". The truth is, if you said the wrong thing, offended someone, acted dumb or disrepectful... you got put in your place QUICK. We had to respect the next man, especially the elders, OGs and cats who had clout. It was that simple. DJ Bojo and I talk ALL THE TIME about how cute alot of these new kids think it is to be "GANGSTA" and want to live out their MUSIC VIDEO FANTASIES. We also often discuss the lack of tact that tends to run rampid in a corporate/office work environment. YOU KNOW a lot of these corporate, suit and tie FUCKS never grew up in the hood. They could care less about who they offend. Why else do you think cats "GO POSTAL"? To those bosses/ co-workers with no respect for their peers, to all those fake video thug, bright color all-over print wearin, hypebeast wanna bes, and to all them kids who have watched too much UFC and now wanna be tough guys... all I can say is IGNORANCE IS BLISS, until you catch a fist. Good luck with that, I hope it all works out for you.
3) Life is too short- Not only was that joint blasting out of every boombox in our neighborhood at the time, but it also became something we learned REALLY quick. By the time I graduated from high school I had been to 12 funerals. Friends, family, acquaintences... you name it. Whether it have been because of drugs, gangs, car accidents, cancer... I learned that if you live fast you die young. If anything I learned to take my time and live life at my own pace. It must have worked cause I'm still here, aren't I?
4) Manage your money- Not saying I grew up in a household where we struggled. Actually far from it. But I was not one of those fortunate kids who got a regular allowance like them kids on TV. PLUS I hated to ask my parents for money. As such... I had to find a way to make sure my pockets weren't empty and I had to make that money last. To this day I still hold on to some of those values. I'm probably the only guy you'll ever meet who can make 12 dollars stretch for 2 weeks; have 2, MAYBE 3 meals out of it and STILL walk away with change. Wanna test? Give me 12 dollars...
5) Live humble- No matter how much you tried to out-do the next man... the rest of the world still saw you as some kid from the hood. Though it is true that we tend to find comfort in the company of those who look just us, it is also true that no matter what you are, you appreciate the differences of those who know and share your story. They too were there with you. if I had grown up in a suburb, amongst kids who were all this color or that color, or who were all of this economic background, I would have lost out on some of the GREATEST cultural experiences of my life. Growing up in a diverse neighborhood, I learned to appreciate the small things and to give thanks for the blessings that are and have been bestowed upon you. The "Haves" who enjoy living flashy just made them an easy target for the "Have nots". Remember... it was the DIRECTOR who rented that Bently, picked out the jewels and hired the models for the video. Never do what they do, kids...
